The always formidable topic in the news (more so in the past ever since his case was dismissed and he was acquitted), R. Kelly, joins hands with Tom Cruise, John Travolta and Nicole Kidman, as they all make a rainbow of gluttony over Scientology. We could, of course, be talking about none other than part three of our six best clip picks from the ninth season of South Park. Hang on tight, because the ride starts right now, and you must be at least five feet tall to get on! (Please keep your hands and arms in the ride at all times!)

Do They (South Park) Get Sued Often, Do You Wonder?
If you ever watched this infamous episode, “Trapped in the Closet,” then you would already know that they dub Scientology as a worldwide scam, perhaps the biggest scam to ever be unearthed. They also make fun of the founder of the cult, L. Ron Hubbard, accusing him of being a pedophile. Finally, nothing is off limits. They bring Tom Cruise and John Travolta into the foray, both Scientologist protagonists, and they top the cake with a cherry that is R. Kelly. Which reminds me: note to self, watch this episode again tonight so I can laugh my buns off!

R. Kelly, Tom Cruise, Scientology: All Easy South Park Targets
If celebrities and their wacky beliefs and tendencies are enough ammo for the tabloids to go shooting off rounds each week, can you imagine what sort of fodder they make for South Park episodes? For example, R. Kelly and his court case involving a minor. Or, Tom Cruise and his obsession with Scientology or his crazy antics when he was last on the Oprah show. And last but now least, Scientology, perhaps one of the oddest cults in the history of mankind. But thank goodness all of these things exist, or this great episode wouldn’t.

‘Trapped in the Closet’ Episode’s Most Memorable Moment in Clip Below
What happens when Tom Cruise hides out in Stan’s closet, Nicole Kidman is unable to talk him back out, and John Travolta is on the way to lend a hand? You have the makings for a hilarious clip from South Park. Oh yeah, let us not forget who opens this great clip (imbedded below), none other than R. Kelly, who quite poignantly makes an ass of himself on national TV (on the show, and typically in real life).